Over time I discover more than before that dealing with the obstacles that come up in life are not easy until you are looking back at it because you are are now facing something more difficult. Dealing with this situation with my exit exam with the nursing department has been one of the most difficult situations that I could have ever imagined. I have learned to adapt to it and just keep myself busy in other things. Unfortuantely the worry and stress that this has caused still shows. I sleep all the time, or I can't fall asleep... I eat crap forget eating healthy... and in the last couple of weeks despite working out like usual I have gained weight! The crazy thing is I want to fight the nursing department, study and get my degree all at the same time but I don't have any time to do any of it. I don't like my job.. I feel like I'm being cheated. It's kinda like I know my potential, how come they can't see it? So many dreams shattered... Five years (an extra year because I chose nursing) all for nothing because I can't get a real job in my field or any other because according to life I'm just a student. I pray about this situation all the time and I really felt that maybe God wanted me to fight this situaiton for the other people coming behind me that may also end up in this situation one day.
My friends and fanily probably think I'm crazy these days cause all I can think or talk about is that fact that I have nothing.. nothing to show for the loans I have taken out, the nights where I worked and then went straight on to class, for the sacrifices that are priceless because they involved the life events of my family and friends. I find myself asking the question , 'What am I supposed to do now?'
I'm sorry I know this is depressing and I hope that the next time I write will be better than this.
1 comment:
The only thing I can say to you is be persistent and keep trying until you reach the end. Going through it seems rough but when you come out you'll see how much it made you grow. Stay positive and stay in His arms.
Now to deal with the stress just pray and actually put it in God's hands. You'll know when you put it there because as soon as you do you'll not have any reason to worry about it again as long as you truly believe that He can do the impossible (Faith). Sleep well knowing that He is ordering your steps. Stay up. See you next time I'm in the ville
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