Full Yet?

How do you decide that enough is enough? When do you know that you've had your fill. My heart yearns for more but my mind says that I'll full for right now... Should I push it away or hold onto it until it spoils because I don't want anyone to have any? Maybe I should just enjoy knowing that we were enjoying each other... Now I push it away because though I'm full and don't want to let go, I would rather have it come back my way the next time I'm hungry than sitting in front of me and spoiling. So goodbye ................. With love,

Krystle

Another year done!

This school year is has been the craziest ever. From not having a car for most of last semester, to having my ex-roommate move her boyfriend in to our apartment... man things have really been crazy not even including the little things that took place in between all of this. Most of all I can see though many bad things have happened, many good things too. I recieved a scholarship that I didn't apply for and moved into a better apartment with a great roommate... and not to mention that other good stuff that I cannot mention out loud yet. Thanks be to God for helping all of us through this school year. Congrats Raquel, Jailyn, and Candace.

Which one are you?

Tough Cookie.

The past few months have been crazy. I get overwelmed just thinking of everything that has happened. Through it all I have learned a few things. 1) Real life is tough, no matter how nice others make it seem. 2) Real friends always show their faces when times get tough. 3) The people who tell you the truth all the time and especially when you don't want to hear it are the ones that should be kept close by. 4) Look though someone elses glasses to make sure you're getting a clear picture in yours. 5) God knows best and His time is not our time. Honestly very few people know what I have been dealing with in the last few months. Sometimes when things come up no matter how hard to try to explain to people how you feel sometimes they just don't get it. Many times this semester I realized that my life is about finding the answer to solve the problem. The problem in the problem sometimes is that there is no solution... So what's the answer? I have no clue! Why do you think I'm writing? Do you follow you're heart? Or use logic? They both seem like they could work but real life isn't that simple. The hardest thing for me to do was stay strong. I was always so easy in the past but it has gotten harder. I have been broken. The year is wrapping up and I am very glad. I'm ready to begin a new year and do this one right. 2007 is mine! Stake your claim on it too but this year is ending and my baggage is staying there.

I did it!

I can't believe I did it! I am so excited and amazed that I did. It looks a little crazy but I love it. It will take a little getting used to but this will be a good experience...I hope. Tell me what you think, it is not complete but it needs to take time to get my natural curl back. I had it cut and colored and I kept my hair.

So much to say but I don't know how to say it.

It has been an interesting summer so far. More than you can imagine. Though there haven't always been good times I wouldn't take any of them back or change what has happened so far. Not knowing what step to take next have made decisions more difficult but at the same time just as fun. It is amazing to see how much all of us have grown when I interact with everyone individually. There is just something about the summer that allows thought and growth in an individual, at least I can say so for myself.

I went to Trinidad and I learned so much about myself because I learned about my family heritage. It was so enlightening to go to a place where my family lived as slaves and were freed. The place was Charlottesville, Tobago and it is beautiful.

My transition that I started last summer has been difficult because I don't like change or stepping out of my comfort zone. But everytime I feel like I want to stop and give up something happens to make me realize how much this needs to happen or someone will remind me of what things could be like in the future. Every day there is a lesson that I am supposed to learn. Most days I cannot focus and my vision is so blurred that I cannot see that there is a leasson sitting right in front of me.

God has given me so much and has promised to give me so much more if I believe and ask in his name. I doubt whether I can overcome my transition but it is not me but him. I have to remind myself that I could not have come this far without him so any futher will not be my doing.

There is so much more that can be expected, just wait for it.

Gone Traveling

At the moment I am sitting in my parents house and I am in the middle of doing my hair though I would much rather be asleep. It has been a long day. Yesterday I was running around huntsville trying to make sure I had everything I needed and then I got in Atlanta this morning and did the same thing. I went on a search to find a african braid shop that would do my hair at a descent price. But since I am poor that didn't exactly workout. So I decided to suck it up and do my hair myself. Now I'm about halfway done and all I want to do is sleep. I'm excited about going to Trinidad and seeing my family. I still get a little nervous on planes but I have more than enough books to comfort me. LOL. Anyway if you have time to check the blog I can give you an update and show you some pictures of Trinidad and Tobago. Oh yea and if you have a request for a souvenoir let me know asap. Lata guys, pray for me and I will be praying for you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIELLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Speak Lord.

I'm actually scared of the future. I never been afraid of this before but now I am.

"There is not fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18

Please pray.

Done with the interrigation process!

For every problem or decision in my life I have questioned God continually. And when I didn't get the answer that I wanted, the way that I wanted it answered I got mad. I been mad at God so much and honestly I should have been mad at myself for not trusting Him more. I heard I poem by Maya Angelou in which she stated that we interrigate God as if we have a right to. How can the clay question the potter, that just doesn't make sense. I believe that my journey to trusting God completely is just begining, though it took a while for me to get here. I have finally waved my white flag, and though I know that I will be waving it many more times, I am willing to continue doing so. I surrender, yes that's right Jailyn I've finally given up!

Trying new things!

Hello friends I hope that all is well and that we all find time this week to update our blogs. I really miss all of the profound thoughts.... I hope everyone is enjoying not having to study or take tests and is working hard to make that money!!!

On tuesday I went to a ballroom dance class and I sucked. It was funny though because I have rhythm and I can dance, but I didn't know any of the steps so I looked like I had two left feet. But it is amazing that people can know the steps to all of dances and make them their own. I really enjoyed it. I have been catching up with friends and trying to keep in contact with everyone while trying not to stay in the house constantly. I've been going swimming and working hard or at least acting like it. Enjoy everyday guys and try new things so that you can have stories to tell when we all get back. My little boo is growing and smiling and talking to everyone. Here is a recent picture. I love you all and I'm praying for you guys.

And another one!

The Lord has blessed! I needed to get a steady client at work and I got one! Thanks to the Lord. That is a wonderful blessing and that is just one of the many that I could share but I don't think that anyone has that kind of time. I went to my family reunion last weekend and it was much better than I thought it would be. I saw cousins that I haven't seen in a while and met others that I did not even know existed. And of course it was great to see my people that I haven't seen in months. Actually coming back to hunsville after that was kinda bittersweet, part of me started to wish that I had went home for the summer. But its all goodI'll make it eventually. For some reason after reading some devotion today I feel empowered as if I can do anything. yea but other than that nothing new is going on with me. I've been thinking about alot lately so maybe one day I'll share it with you. Peace, Love and Blessings SALSA!

May 25!!

May is over already! I'm still thinking that school just got out but time is going to fly by so quickly. The Lord has blessed me so far by allowing me to get more cases at work and hopefully they will just continue to pickup. I am very happy that Kell is back, I've missed her sarcasim! But I am sad that Mellena is leaving so soon. Thank you all for prying for my family cause so far things have worked themselves out and I know God is working on the rest. I'm going home thisweekend for a "family reunion" and for Mi'chelle's graduation. Mel, J can yoiu believe that girl will be a OC with us in august? Man we're getting old. Anyway my nephew "boo boo" is too cute and he's getting fatter (YES!!). Anyway that's the update for now. Praying for you all.

Loser

OK I wrote a nice long blog for you guys and it erased sorry but I cna't think to write that all again. Sorry until next time, or else call me and I'll tell you. Technology really sucks sometimes.

Only the begining

So far this summer I have gotten myself into some things that I may not do or that I haven't done in a while. I'm sewing, crocheting, already read 1 and half books, and started working on my scrapbook. That is only a few of the things that I have planned for this summer. I have high hopes for this summer and hopefully I won't be disappointed. I really fell something good coming this summer, I don't know what it is but I hope I'm not getting my hopes up for no reason. Well until next time....

Seize the day!

My prayer circle...is you..

Yes all of you are in my prayer circle and I am asking that you pray for my family. There are some situations going on that only the Lord, and I mean only He can handle. Who else do you turn to when it is only possible with God. Please pary that his will be done and that the best and not the worst will come out of this.

Thanks guys.
Krystle

Ungrateful, Maybe?

It is obvious that we take alot for granted. Who would have thought that a drive home after finals would be the last day that two girls would be alive? Okay understand what I am saying for a second. They were not at the club or in a place where someone would assume that it would happen. I just hope that they were living right and they both were able to have a relationship with God. And if this is not enough of a wake-up call for some I don't know what it will take to wake them up. I also found out that a distant cousin of mine was found dead in his cousin's house last night. It seems that there was a robbery and he was shot.He had just graduated from aeronautical school and was about to move because he received a job. Once again he was nto out in aparant danger, though he could have been. All of the things that we worry about mean nothing if we won't be saved one day. Let's not take anyone or anything in our lives for granted. And though you may not always want to, let those who you care about know that you love them, whether is through actions or words. Often we underestimate the power and influence that we have through our actions, words, and even our lack of action. I found this quote by Nelson Mandela that I believe is very powerful.

Our Greatest Fear

Nelson Mandela, 1994 Inaugural Speech



Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,but that we are powerful beyond measure.It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.Your playing small does not serve the world.There is nothing enlightened about shrinkingso that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine,we consciously give other people permission to do the same.As we are liberated from our fear,our presence automatically liberates others.

For all who do not know I love you all and you have a special place in my heart.

Starting a Trend

I spent another weekend at home, again, not sure if it was by choice though. Both Alumni weekend and Youth Congress weekend I did not do what I usually would, instead I stayed away from the crowds. I actually have felt more relaxed and I have come to terms with the fact that I am not a "social butterfly". Learning to be comfortable with myself is one of the hardest things that I have had to do, but I am having fun doing it. Everything around me is changing and I am learning to deal with it without rejecting it. Everyone around me is changing and growing also. Good job guys!

Alright well that's all for now. This is the last week of classes and I know that I do not feel like studying anythign or looking at a single book. I just want to sleep, eat, an dmake money. Okay so I'm jumping the gun a little bit, I know I have to take my finals first. 4 more days, and I can take a break.

Counting my blessings.

There is someone who is apart of my life that was not here this time last week...It's Daniel (Boo Boo) Jones!!! He came into the world calmly but determined to be outside of the womb. His mother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and well wishers are very happy to have him here. Welcome Daniel!!

Officially 1 week and 5 days left of classes and I feel like I have senioritis, only I'm not a senior. Lately there has been alot more procrastinating on my part and its taking over my life!! But I feel mentally and physically drained from school. In spite of my slackness God has been blessing me and I am doing well in my classes because of his grace... It is only through him that I made it through nursing this far, while doing fitness & wellness. So I have to thank God for these blessings.

Last week was trying for my emotionally. I went to work two weeks ago for my evaluation. Basically on a scale of 1 to 4, (1 being the best and 4 the worst) I got a.... 4. A 4!!!! Can you believe it? I was devastated because I have being trying very hard to do everthing that they expect of me. What makes me upset is that as far as work int he store goes I was always the one trying to find something to do and when I was given a task I always worked until it was done. I worked hard but they did not seem to care about that. I didn't know what to do. They put me on probabtion and said that I would be evaluated again in may. But Monday something told me to go to a Senior Assisted Living Center and apply. I went and on the spot I was given a job for after school finished. Also the nursing Recruiter a Huntsville hospital called and told me to apply again so that she could check out my application!! God is so good!! The Lord is blessing me and giving me options, Praise Him!!

Issues with trusting God have kept me back from many blessings that I know he has waiting for me. There is so much I want to trust him with and I am workign on doing that one bit at a time. And because he hasn't failed me yet my strength in him is building. I don't know when I'll be ready for the blessings that he is holding onto for me but I know that they are there.

Have a great week! We are almost done with this school year. (Okay so I got a little happy with the camerra on Sat. nite :), oops)

Counting Down !! Part 2

There are officially 2 weeks and 5 days left of school for this semester. The reality of the ending of my junior year is really setting in. I find myself often looking back at this school year and what has and hsa not taken place. I will be 21 this year and I find myself re-evaluating everything that I though I was and what I want to become. I know that I am not the only one who has been doing this either. In the movie 30 Years to Life a group of friends were evaluating their lives and what they hoped to have had by this time. If you have not seen this movie you should...it was like looking at my own personal circle.

While talking to a friend this week I realized that many people on campus are looking and seeing the same things that my friends and I always talk about. He said something interesting..he said that there are too many goodlooking people on campus who were unhappy. I found this interesting because I am hearing of more situations where those in relationships are leaving them because they are not happy and somehow they thought that being in one would make them happy. The reality is that most people who are not happy with themselves will not be happy with someone else. While talking to my friend he asked me what I thought would be the best way to avoid ending up in a situation like that, and I found that odd because he was so much older than me and I felt like he should be shedding some wisdom in my direction. But I answered him saying that it is important to find ourselves and be comfortabel with yourself. I feel like my girls and I are on the road to self-discovery and I told him that it is important to have peopl ein your life who won't let you feel sorry for yourself and who will tell you the truth. My friend was very impressed and told me that though there were goodlooking people on campus he was looking for something that was really of substance, his words were actually something with some fire... Wraping this up, it is important to exercise faith (and I'm speaking to myself too..) and trust God. It is obvious that he will not fail us or intentionally do wrong to us, clearly how far we have come is an indication of that. Just be prepared in case your day is today... I believe that is the time that I should be working on me. This is probably the only time that I will have in my life to worry about only me. I might as well enjoy it.

Boy have times changed...

The things that I have seen change in my lifetime is sometimes hard to fathom. Times are changing for the good, even though some seem like they are for the bad. I don't know about anyone else but I want to be ready for whatever comes. No one knows the future but we can put our best foot forward and step out on faith. Oh the things I have seen and the people that have changed... I just chuckle to myself. Kell so much to tell you when you come back!

Peace, Love, Blessings to all!