New Challenge

I have decided that I am going to run in a Marathon! My goal is to try for the GA Marathon in March. I have 8 months to do it and I don't know how I'm going to but I am going to try.

In the words of India...

I am ready for love... why are you hiding from me... I'll give up my freedom to be held in your captivity...

In the words that India sings I feel like I can really relate. It seems as though everytime that something potentially good comes into my life it kinda just dissipates.... The thing is I know I'm a good catch with a banging body so whats the deal? More recently someone came into my life that I have had a stronger connection with than I have with anyone in a very long time. It was scary at first and I admit I held back but at the same time it was good to know that it could happen for me again.

Lately I've been torn because I'm not sure if God will me the desires of my heart just because I want it or because that is what he has for me. I'm trying to trust Him but doubts creep in when I remember that two people can be headed down a path to meet one day as God intended and one person can leave the path and it is possible that the two will never meet.

Movies like Something New and Programs like Black Women in America highlight the lack of black men available. And then left with the ones available there has to be a connection... Two people may match on paper but that may be as far as it goes.

I just want who God has for me. I just pray that he is ready when I am ready.

Let Go and Let God...?

I had a moment in church today where the speaker asked a question that I have been thinking abou tbut have been to afraid to ask. Before I get to that though here are somethings that I was thinking about during church.



Sometimes we allow ourselves to forget how good God is and how much He has done for us when we are nothing but sinners and nothing is owed to us. Sacrifices that we claim to make do not compare to the miracles of life and the extra blessings tha the gives us though we do not deserve it. Thank You Lord!



We need to tell God how we feel, He is our best friend and will look out for us more thaan than any of our friends ever will. Everything that you need him to be for you He can be that and much more. Ask, Believe and Claim! Remember that He is not human and He will not fail you!
During church the speaker went ont o say that God's first response may not be His last and the we should persisitently pray for whatever it is that we are asking for.

I was quite torn about the persistent prayers so I talked over with some friends to get their perspective. The response I got was the Hannah prayed for a long time for a child. She could have given up when God didn't give her one but she continued to pray until she was told that she would have a son. Immediately after hearing this she told God that in her gratitude that she would give her child back to Him.

Hannah got what she desired in God's time through her persistent prayers. Maybe God wanted her to wait for the appropriate time in her life or maybe God just wanted to increase her faith...whatever it was that God was doing....I'm gonna just keep praying.

The Next Phases of Life.... Chapter ?

So much has changed since I started this blog and since I have last written that I don't know where to begin. I going to start by saying that God is good. He is too good to us sometimes especially when we don't deserve it... So far this year I have managed to make it out of undergrad and I am now moving out into the workforce. As excited as I am now I had so much more fear when the semester was ending. Letting go of being in school all my life was difficult. Because there isn't another level after college where someone can see their friends and deal with life changing issues with people they grown with and are comfortable I wasn't completely ready to close the chapter on my college years. Though I did have some anxiety I am better now knowing that I felt this same way when I left high school and it obviously didn't turn out as bad as I expected.

Moving on into the next chapters of my life are exciting and scary. Many of my friends are getting married, having children or doing both and honestly I am starting to feel left behind. All of our conversations have turned into convos about marriage, babies, houses and retirement! It is exciting to see my friends move on and have happy and productive lives and it makes me want more for that time in my life whenever it comes. I just didn't expect that it would happen for my friends so soon. I guess I always had that idea in my head that we all would enjoy our youth at little longer and then it a few years it would happen for all of us tat the same time... lol I guess that is my fault for expecting something like that... that is crazy that I really believed that though.

Where do I go from here? Where will I end up? What should I expect next?

These are questions that I have been asking myself for months, but they were much easier to handle when I was still in school, but now that reality has hit...